Don’t you be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you.
Yes, I will uphold you with the
right hand of my righteousness
Isaiah 41:10
I have never been one to take failure very well. And I have always strived to do the right thing in every situation because I don't like to disappoint anyone. That is what is inbred in me. It's who I am. Because of this, I really struggle with making major decisions for my life, like what I should be doing as a career. In my mind, I know that no matter what I do, God and my family will be proud of me but it is so hard for me to fully believe that in my heart. I want to follow God's will for my life because ultimately, He knows where I should be and what I should be doing and what will make me happiest; it's the not knowing what exactly His will is that gets me.
I understand that He gives us choices and His will can be carried out as long as we don't stray from His path, but I just can't help but doubt my choices and actions. I get so afraid that I just tell myself "oh, I'll drop everything and follow His will when He tells me what to do." But, I think all of this doubt and fear is keeping me from hearing His voice and I am tired of it.
I have been at the same job and in the same routine for three years now and I am comfortable. Well, miserable but comfortable. And that, my friends, is a dangerous situation to be in. I am not taking any risks or doing what I love. I am just stuck.
Talking with Emily tonight has made me realize all of this and I think I am ready to do something about it. We set a date next Friday night to look into schools for me to go to. I can tell you that I am terrified, but relieved. I need to do something more with my life. Right now, I feel useless.
If I finally start doing something I love, I could gear my career, my passion, and my life to furthering the Kingdom of God in ways I never thought I could. And I know that whatever I decide to do, my Father will bless me in ways I can't imagine. All it takes is a leap of Faith.
God is never going to leave you. He loves you BEYOND comprehension. You have to TRUST that if you are going in the wrong direction, he will stop you or let you know and turn you around. In Matthew 4:1-4 it reads, "Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted there by the devil. For forty days and forty nights he fasted and became very hungry.During that time the devil came and said to him, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become loaves of bread.”
ReplyDeleteBut Jesus told him, “No! The Scriptures say, ‘People do not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.'”
After reading this one day, I realized Satan tried to make Jesus, the Son of God, DOUBT that he was the Son of God.
You are so gifted and so talented! God has an AMAZING plan in store for you. Don't allow Satan to let you doubt your capabilities. Hold tight to the truth, and dive in head first into faith. I promise you won't regret it :-) Love you Cassie!!!